"If the words you spoke appeared on your skin, would you still be beautiful? Would you still have the courage to face the world? Would it matter if you hurt someone? Would you finally be happy?"
These questions haunt me everyday. I try not to pay heed. I keep these intrusive thoughts at bay. I try to protect myself from the unruliness of self. I fail. Time and again, I fight this war and lose a part of me to the other side. Until one day, I find myself at the end of me. I can give no further. Welcome to hell, I think to myself but strangely enough I feel indifferent to this place. If anything, a strange warmth comforts me.
I walk these grounds a seasoned veteran; a stark contrast to the terrified novice I had hoped to be. Somehow the coldness seeps into my soul all too naturally as I let go of my facade.
I embrace the chaos that I always subdued. Resentment chief among all. Unreasonably so, I will hate you like I mean it. I choose who I let into my world. Hurt I will cause, not 'cause I hurt. I will be everything I stood for and everything I stood against, all at once. I shall hear the cries and wipe the tears of those who beseech me to stay. I will push away what matters because matter it does not. The choice is yours to make. If it feels right...
I had strings but now I'm free, there are no strings on me.
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